telling the grandparents

We told the grandparents we were expecting at Christmas. I was 11 weeks pregnant and honestly would've liked to wait a few more weeks to share our news, but the holidays were such a perfect time to make the announcement.

I generally shy away from big announcements, so I felt a little uncomfortable with all the attention. But there isn't a lot of exciting news in either of our families very often, so I was also looking forward to sharing something worth celebrating with them. Especially since this news was a huge surprise that I knew none of them were expecting!

I actually came up with the announcement gifts completely on my own and they turned out perfectly. So many pregnancy reveals are kind of cheesy, but cheesy or not, I'm so glad that our parents each got to open a little gift and have a souvenir to commemorate the news.

We gave my mom a stocking full of treats and in the bottom was a silver fortune cookie which I told her was a New Year's gift and contained her fortune for 2018:

Her expression was priceless. She was so excited. I've never seen her so happy in my life and she said it was the best news she's ever gotten (after finding out that she was expecting me and my brother).

Next up was my dad. I couldn't resist this as a reveal gift:

Ha! My dad is a pretty reserved guy and I think he was in total shock. As he was processing the news, his girlfriend was fist-pumping and yelling "YAY!" (And I was laughing like an awkward maniac.)

I told him that he had to come up with his grandparent name and he said "Oh we have to do that, do we?" and I said "Well, you don't have to. We can pick a name for you. Or the baby can just call you Old Granddad!" and he said "No, no! I think I can come up with something better than that!"

We wanted to tell Larry's family the news in person, but we couldn't manage to get everyone together in one place, so we ended up calling them and telling them on speakerphone. Larry's mom said "Oh my lands!", his sister cried, and his brother responded with a hilarious stream of expletives and then said "I just want to drive down there right now and give you guys a hug!" They were all so excited and happy. A few weeks later, we were able to visit them and give Larry's mom the reveal gift (a ceramic bird), plus a bonus (a little egg with "It's a boy!" inside) since they didn't know the gender yet. Everyone cried again. I love that the Smiths are happy criers.




These pictures make me teary and make me excited to have a son. I hope that our boy grows up to be as sweet as Larry is to his mama.

These photos are all screenshots from video taken on my phone, so they are not the best quality, but I am so glad to have captured the grandparents' reactions. I know our boy will be happy to have them one day. Telling our families is definitely one of the sweetest memories of this pregnancy so far. I really didn't anticipate just how excited they would be! If I had known that the grandparents would be this happy, maybe Larry and I would've considered having kids sooner!

expanding our pack

We're adding another hiking buddy to our pack of boys this summer. Baby Smith is due in July!

Surprise! I'm pregnant! (Emphasis on the surprise!) And yes, I lugged a tripod into the woods to take this picture, and it was extremely awkward, but I made sure we were deep enough into the trees so no one else could see us.

I'm 16 weeks along, and comfortably out of the first trimester, though I have yet to feel the "magical burst of energy" that was promised to me in the second tri. In fact, I'm just now starting to feel the slightest bit of relief from the absolute crushing fatigue that plagued me from weeks 7 through 15. I spent all of December and January lying on the sofa taking multiple naps each day and proclaiming to Larry that I felt like "rotten garbage." My rotten garbage analogy took on a life of its own when Larry would try to come up with a more disgusting analogy each day: "Do you feel like dirty poop today? A truck stop bathroom? A leaky porta-john?" Yes, yes, and yes. And it's a good thing we're having a boy because we both seem to have the sense of humor of five year old boys ourselves!

When I told Larry I was pregnant, he laughed. Then he said "You know one thing our kid will never do?" and I said "Go to Disney World?" and he said "How did you know?!" and then we high-fived and laughed. So we're already on the same page when it comes to parenting. Sorry, kid - we'll take you to as many national parks and foreign countries as we can afford, but never Disney!

Larry and I are both still in shock over the news and I probably will be until I give birth/for the next 18 years/forever.

Him: I don't think I'll believe you're pregnant until I have proof!
Me: You mean like seeing a human come out of my va--
Him: No! Like when you have a belly!
Me: Well I kind of already have a belly...
Him: No, I mean A BELLY. Like THIS! (Pats his own belly.)
Me: How many weeks gestation is that?
Him: 46 years!

Yeah, I went there. And I'm finding that the secret to surviving pregnancy (and I'm assuming childbirth and parenting, too) is to have a sense of humor. I'm so glad I have Larry to keep me laughing when I feel like rotten garbage.

P.S. I definitely don't plan on turning this into a baby blog, but right now this pregnancy is a big thing happening in my life, so I should probably document it. I know I'll be glad I did in a few years. This is a blog about my life and my family, so our baby will definitely appear here, but hopefully interspersed with and included in posts about our other interests: travel, art, books, music, food/cooking, hiking, etc. My goal as a parent is to integrate our child into the lifestyle we already enjoy and to include him in the things that we already love to do. But right now, I'm too mentally and physically exhausted to have other interests - the double whammy of pregnancy during my winter hibernation season left me unable to read, watch TV, put on real clothes, or do anything besides listen to music while lying under a blanket. Hopefully I'll be back to blogging the backlog of trips we've taken over the past few years soon, but I'll also share a couple posts per trimester about the pregnancy. 

weekend adventures | exploring hillwood gardens

Spring is always such a beautiful, yet fleeting, season in DC. It seemed to disappear even more quickly than usual this year, I think because we were traveling and because horrible weather (a month of rain) kept us from enjoying our usual outdoorsy activities. But in the middle of April, we had a weekend of perfect weather, so we took my mother to explore Hillwood Gardens for her birthday. The gardens were in full bloom, the sun was shining, and the sky was vivid blue.

Hillwood Gardens is an estate purchased by Marjorie Merriweather Post in 1955. Marjorie was the owner of Post Cereal, the founder of General Foods, and the richest woman in America. We toured the mansion, and it was ridiculous what money could buy - she collected Fabergé eggs, French and Russian art, and jewelry, had multiple estates, and a huge staff that kept everything running smoothly. I much preferred the gardens to the interior of the house (which was filled to the brim with all the expensive useless things that money could buy). But despite her tastes in decorating (so many portraits of herself!), Marjorie was a philanthropist, an excellent employer, a skilled businesswoman, and an animal lover.

But back to the gardens! I think of DC as such an urban space, and always find it surprising to stumble on gardens and wooded areas within the city. From the mansion's portico, there was actually a view across the lawn to the Washington Monument in the distance. Just imagine the garden parties you could have here. Someone get me a cocktail!








Most of my photos were taken in the Japanese garden because that was my favorite. But there was also a pet cemetery, a cutting garden, a French parterre, a putting green, a rose garden where Marjorie's ashes are located, and the lunar lawn which is watched over by Leo the stone lion and which offers that billion dollar view towards the Washington Monument. While I enjoy the gardens at the National Arboretum more, what's remarkable to me about Hillwood is that it was a privately owned residence. It's a lifestyle I just can't imagine living, though it was fun to pretend for a day.

wyoming | 1992 vs. 2014

Wyoming has a special place in my heart. I first visited in the summer of 1992. I was thirteen, had just finished seventh grade, and was at the height of my awkward years. Airfare prices had plummeted that year and my usually thrifty parents decided we should use the opportunity to take a vacation. It was the first and last time I would fly on an airplane with my parents. It was the first and last vacation my family took to a place other than the Jersey shore. A couple years after the big trip out west, my parents would divorce, and all the traveling I've done since then has been solo, or with friends, or with Larry.

When my parents suggested that our big family vacation of '92 should be to Wyoming, I rolled my eyes in disgust. I wanted to go to the Grand Canyon. Wyoming only had like two people in the entire state, I argued. To a thirteen year old this sounded lame and boring. Besides, hadn't the whole state burned up a few years before in the Yellowstone forest fires of 1988?

But we went to Wyoming, and sure enough it was awesome. Yes, my parents were right. Mom, Dad, my brother Stephen, and I spent a week and a half admiring the Tetons, staying at a dude ranch, sightseeing in Jackson Hole, and exploring Yellowstone National Park. It was my first time away from the East Coast and it blew my mind. The experience stuck with me for life. Looking back, it probably started my love affair with the National Parks.

This past July, Larry had another business trip to Wyoming, and this time I finally got to tag along and return to the place that had made such an impression on me 22 years before. Once again it was the trip of a lifetime. After Larry's meetings were over, we had a long weekend together to hike, bike, and raft in the Tetons, drive through Yellowstone, and eat our way through the restaurants in Jackson Hole. Wyoming is just as amazing in 2014 as it was in 1992, and the Teton Range still takes my breath away. I have lots of photos from our trip to share in the coming weeks, but first I thought it would be fun to compare some photos from my trip in 1992 to photos from our trip in 2014...

In 1992, tight-rolled jeans were cool and Hypercolor shirts were all the rage. Awkward middle-school Rachel thought these trends looked wicked cool with matching colored socks. (Just give up on ever having a boyfriend now, teenage Rachel! Though if it's any consolation, your future husband was a college boy who had just turned 21 in the summer of '92. Wait ten years and you'll meet him! Also, when you get home from this trip, you will get a puppy, which is better than a boyfriend anyway.) Anyway, this combination of me being thirteen plus the fashion nightmare of the early 90s sets the stage for some primo awkward family photos:






Spoiler alert: I'm still awkward. IN FACT, I PRETTY MUCH LOOK THE SAME. (Insert bleeding eyes emoji. #nevergrowup) The only thing I have going for me now is that Hypercolor went bankrupt. But anyway, let's compare - 1992 vs. 2014:

Rafting the Snake River, now with fatter head:

Geothermal runoff in Yellowstone:

I think 35 year old me needs some pink shorts:

Bison, you haven't changed a bit!:

Rockin' the shades with my brother (top) and husband (bottom):

Global warming is real, people:

At the Jackson Hole elk antler arches. Way to rock the teal and purple, Steve! Fanny pack optional:

Grand Prismatic Spring:

Interesting to note the regrowth from the 1988 forest fires:

In front of the Tetons:

View from the raft. I swear those two trees on the ridge in the upper left look the exact same:

Clearly the purple socks would've gone better with the 2014 outfit:

Excelsior Geyser Crater:

Both experiences were amazing and I can't wait to write more about what we did on our 2014 trip.
I only wish Larry and I had the chance to ride the alpine slide while outfitted in BUM Equipment and pegged jeans like my bro and I did back in '92...

Red socks go with red shirt, duh.

And if I can find a dot matrix printer and some PrintShop clip art, maybe I can make a sweet album for our 2014 trip like I did in 1992:

On second thought, maybe I'll just blog about it instead...

perspective + changes

March was a difficult and introspective month. We spent some time visiting Larry's dad, who was in the hospital recovering from somewhat unexpected triple coronary bypass surgery. Scary, eye-opening stuff. As Larry and I were driving home to Virginia after several days spent in the hospital, we turned to each other and said "Life is f***ing brutal." It was a difficult thing to witness and it was definitely a thought-provoking weekend.

Larry and I have been making some pretty drastic changes to our lives since the beginning of the year, and the events of this month have further fueled our desire to change many aspects of our lives. We've been keeping to ourselves a lot lately, which has given me a lot of clarity and time to evaluate the choices we make, our health, and our relationships. My perspective on so many things has changed for the better over the past few weeks.

Between the quiet post and the productivity post and the changes we are currently working on, I feel like I'm going all self-helpy and inspirational, but never fear, my sarcastic potty-mouthed self is still alive and well. I'm just really liking this new direction and the new priorities in my life, and I'm feeling way more relaxed and motivated, which is an unexpected reaction to such a stressful event.

The changes we're making aren't things I'm ready to write about yet, as I feel like I set myself up to fail whenever I make set-in-stone lists of goals to accomplish. Instead, we're adapting and evaluating the choices we make as we go to achieve what we're comfortable with. Changing our lifestyle is bigger than crossing things off a list, so I'll share what we've accomplished if/when I feel confident that we've succeeded at making permanent changes. (Does that sound cryptic? I didn't mean for it to - we're simply trying to live healthier, smarter, happier and more aware.)

As for Larry's dad - his surgery was a success, we were impressed by the care he was getting (big thanks to all the hardworking and compassionate nurses out there!) and he is now finally home from the hospital. He has a long road of recovery and change ahead, but then again, don't we all?

ten things I learned from my mother

Mom, 1974.

My mother had a milestone birthday last month. I was ready to celebrate - a small dinner party perhaps, or a family brunch? At the very least, a CAAAAAAKE! She turned me down. In fact, when I asked her what she wanted to do for her birthday, she responded "NOTHING!", "Forget about it!", "Absolutely no presents!", and even "I drew a frowny face on the calendar." :(

It was a bit of a buzz kill, but for once I listened to her. It may have taken me thirty-four years, but I'm finally learning to accept my parents for who they are, just as I've expected them to accept me (and my many quirks and bad habits). My mom is not a partier, and just because I want to celebrate, doesn't mean that she does. I can't change my mom and she can't change me. I love her for who she is and I love her for loving me even though I suck at keeping my house clean, am always doing things at the last minute, and never respond to voice mails.

My mom is an amazing woman. She's funny, she's feisty, and she's taught me the most important things I know. She doesn't want material things, so this is my gift to her:

Ten Things I Learned From My Mother

1. Be kind to animals. Respect nature. My mom grew up on a dairy farm, surrounded by cows and horses. She even had a pet hawk! She taught my brother (who now works in an animal hospital) and me to be animal lovers from the day we were born. She also taught us to be curious about the natural world and to respect nature: be quiet when you're out in the woods, tread softly and be gentle, leave things the way you found them.

My mother and grandfather, 1946.

2. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. When I was growing up, my mother wouldn't let us leave the house before eating a proper breakfast. She made breakfast for me every day - and not just a bowl of cereal, she often made eggs or french toast for me before school. (Lucky me!) Breakfast is still my favorite meal and don't try to get me to do anything or go anywhere in the morning before eating. (Warning: I'm cranky!)

3. Have a sense of humor. My childhood friends thought my mom was hilarious (maybe that was because she always said curse words while driving!) and she has a great sense of humor. She taught me to surround myself with funny people - my uncles and great uncles were jokesters and I scored myself a pretty hilarious husband. Life is just better when you can laugh.

Mom (on horseback) & cousin Emmy, late 1950s.

The horses are Sleep (the mama horse) and her daughters, Mamselle and ChaCha.

4. Don't spend money you don't have. To this day, the only debt I've ever had is my mortgage. I've always paid off my credit card. (In fact, it wasn't until my twenties that I understood what credit really was - I didn't even know that there was the option of not paying your credit card bill in its entirety every month!) When I graduated college, I slept on the floor in my first apartment until I could afford a mattress. I drove my first car into the ground, and when it died, I went without a car for a few months until I could pay cash for a new one. I may never be rich, but I can't thank my mother enough for teaching me how important it is to stay out of debt.

5. Reading is one of the greatest pleasures in life. My mom is a lifelong bookworm. Some of my most reassuring childhood memories are of the bedtime stories she read me each night. She taught me to love books from an early age, both by reading to me and by example - she always has a huge stack of library books in bed with her.

Mom, 1945-1946 - with my grandfather on Copper.

6. Stand up for the ones you love. It wasn't until I was an adult that I understood that my mom is an introvert and a homebody. Growing up, I was always so shy and felt I could never measure up to my mother - she always seemed so outgoing and confident. I finally realized that these traits were the result of her being a fierce mama bear and doing whatever she had to do to protect her children - even if it was out of her comfort zone. If someone messed with my brother or me, you can bet my mom was going to be in their face about it. She was loyal, she was protective, and she always did the right thing (even if some of these things were to the embarrassment of her children!) Thanks for sticking up for me, Mom!

7. Don't pay someone to do something you can do yourself. My mother has always valued her independence and her ability to do things herself - even if some of those things are completely dangerous. Gutters need cleaned? You'll find my mom on the roof. Toilet needs replaced? Break out the wrench, she's doing it herself! Need a new walkway? She's hauling concrete pavers on her back. Flames, electricity, hot water pipes - she's not afraid to tackle anything!

8. Correct spelling and proper grammar are important. My mom was an editor. In addition to teaching me to read and love books, she taught me the importance of learning to spell and write. She broke out her red pencil on the stories I brought home from school and taught me how to look things up in a dictionary. To this day, I value spelling words out and writing properly - you'll never catch me using "u" for you or "r" for are even in a text message. And while I'm sure an English major could bleed all over my blog posts (they are blog posts and not polished final pieces after all), I'm careful to proofread and like to think that I can write decently enough to put thoughts together in a coherent written format with minimal typos. (Also, I want to punch things when I see you're/your, it's/its and their/there/they're get mixed up. Don't even get me started on misused apostrophes. Anyway, I get this from my mom. Thanks for teaching me to not sound like an idiot, Mom!)

Mom on ChaCha. Her beloved red VW is in the background. (Not sure when this was taken. In the 70s?)

9. There's always room for ice cream. Also, make desserts from scratch. My sweet tooth is definitely a trait I inherited from my mother. My earliest memories in the kitchen are of baking with Mom. My mom still loves to bake and so do I - it's always a battle over who gets to bring dessert to family functions! When I was a kid, Mom took a cake decorating class and she made elaborate cakes for every birthday. (The 3-D Cabbage Patch Doll cake she made for my 5th? 6th? birthday was definitely a favorite!) She always made her icing from scratch, too, and I was aghast when I learned that some of my friends' moms used icing from a container. 

10. Be stubborn. Yes, this is a frustrating trait, but my mom has taught me that it's important to stand up for what you believe in. And if she calls me stubborn, I'll just tell her I get it from her!

As for her birthday, I finally convinced her to let me take her out for a sandwich and ice cream. There was no party, no balloons, no presents - just a few hours spent with my mom. We did it her way, and other than the fact that there was no caaaaaaake, it was pretty much perfect. So Mom, I'll let you keep on being a party pooper if you let me keep on avoiding my voice mails...

I love you.

christmas 2012

I'm starting to realize that our Christmases look the same every year: The dogs shred wrapping paper. We eat delicious food. We exchange bottles of wine and liquor.

Still, I like to document the event, if only to see who's been wearing the same sweater to Christmas dinner three years in a row (cough*Larry*cough)...

Christmas morning was a little more relaxed in the Smoellke household this year since we had already torn into our presents on Christmas Eve early Christmas morning. The pups had to wait for Santa until they could open their gifts, though. And they celebrate Christmas with the joie de vivre of a pair of six year old children. There was shredding and prancing and pouncing and jumping in celebration of their new stuffed shark and dragon.

Every year, I think I will get some cute pics of the dogs enjoying their gifts by the tree, and every year, I GET THIS EXACT SAME PHOTO:

We ate breakfast and then headed to Maryland for Christmas afternoon/dinner/gift booze exchange at my aunt and uncle's:





CAAAAAAAAKE! Yesssssss!



BOOZE! Yesssssss!

GRAPEFRUITS! Yesssssss! (This would be way funnier if they were melons...)

We ended the day with some Glogg...

...and a family photo:

And here's our family photo from Christmas 2011. See what I mean about our Christmases starting to look the same each year?

Speaking of family photos, once we got home to Virginia, it was time to attempt to take a family photo of our own. With the pups. Banjo was confused:

We tried bribing them with treats:

And Banjo tried his best to photobomb our attempts with his less-photogenic end. "Thanks for the treats, Mom, now take a picture of MY BUTT!"

Ok, so Gravy got in on the photobombing fun, too. "Time to clean out my eye socket with my tongue!"

As it turns out, the pups aren't the only photobombers in the family:

Does that face look familiar? Perhaps eerily similar to a photo from Christmas 2010...

(Remember back when our fireplace actually worked and we didn't have a bad ass metal deer head hanging above it???)

Best attempt after banishing the dogs:

Anyway, screw it. Time to put my feet up and tap into that booze...

(To clarify, I'm drinking a glass of white wine, not a glass full of St. Germain.)

The end.